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Fantasy Football Hot Takes: Tom Brady, D’Andre Swift, Tyreek Hill (2022)

Fantasy Football Hot Takes: Tom Brady, D’Andre Swift, Tyreek Hill (2022)

Fantasy football content is too vanilla. At least that’s what I tell myself, as I delve deep into analytics and the new-age projection models and hold them up to the bright light of game tape. Every single summer ends in a cacophony of noise from analysts, mostly in an effort to posture their opinion above those of their peers. Then, the NFL season starts and all hell breaks loose. Nobody is remotely close and we never really cared enough about the takes to look back and talk about it.

The buildup and anticipation for each upcoming season is agonizingly slow, compared to how quickly it flies by once the opening kickoff on Thursday is launched into the air. Carpe diem. Let’s say, for giggles, that we could slow down the regular season in our minds and really savor every little spicy tidbit. That’s the goal with my hashtag PICANTakes on Twitter: to guess the improbable (but plausible) performances that send fantasy managers into a tizzy. I like to daydream and think of events that fly right in the face of the overriding narratives. The ones that we review and mutter, “Why didn’t we see that coming?” If I am to live up to my online alter ego of “the King of Spice,” it would be pretty cool if my creativity and intuition could masquerade as an ability to predict the future. As our rollercoaster carriage climbs agonizingly toward the free-fall-into-corkscrew that is Week 1 (clankety, clankety, clank), close your eyes, put your hands in the air and listen to what I’m cooking up for the first slate of 2022.

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The Jets-Ravens Combine for the Highest Total Game of Week 1

I have bankrolled many of my ridiculous number of fantasy teams with my earnings playing DFS. Part of identifying breakout players to win at DFS is identifying games that might not have the highest implied point total according to Vegas that week. We know Lamar Jackson is ready to go out and light up the Jets to throw a few more dollars into his next contract. His weaponry is very clear. Mark Andrews and Rashod Bateman will draw most of the target volume, while Jackson will be on the move as a rusher just as often as he hands it off.

The flip side of this prediction is that I believe the Jets’ offense will move the ball on Baltimore quite easily, whether the starting QB is Zach Wilson or Joe Flacco. This has all the makings of a sneaky shootout, bringing players like Elijah Moore and Breece Hall into immediate focus. The Ravens’ defense has a long legacy of formidable units, but more recent teams have been very forgiving. Baltimore was 19th in total defense in 2021 and allowed an NFL-worst six yards per play. Other than better health in the secondary, this unit has not made any meaningful changes in personnel and lost defensive coordinator Wink Martindale. The Jets can beat the Ravens, especially in a shootout situation.

Tom Brady Gets Sacked Six Times and Commits Three Turnovers

Yes, the Cowboys must be talked about. Tom Brady took a good portion of the summer off for undisclosed reasons. If he had known his offensive line would be depleted before Week 1, he might have stayed retired. These same two teams met in Week 1 last season in a thriller that the Bucs narrowly won. Dan Quinn is going to dial up some intense pressure looks for the 45-year-old to deal with. I don’t know if it will be enough to win the game, but I have a strong suspicion that Brady will be very rusty and make some mistakes.

Dallas will need to win games with their defense this season. The offense is short on receiving weapons and Tyron Smith’s injury cripples an already-suspect line. DeMarcus Lawrence and Micah Parsons form a nasty one-two punch. Rookie Sam Williams has also shown out in the preseason. On the back end, the Cowboys are ultra-aggressive and will jump routes as often as they can. Brady is the greatest to ever do it, but this is the first season where even he has mentioned his age in a dubious light. While everyone else is talking about the Bucs’ defense versus Dak Prescott, I will be focused on Brady trying to avoid embarrassment in a hailstorm of rushers half his age.

The Dolphins Defeat the Patriots by Double-Digits with Huge Offensive Eruption

The hallmark of the legendary Belichick era has arguably been the defense more than its handsome former QB. For whatever reason, the Patriots have really struggled against Miami over the years. Now, the Dolphins have finally fielded a competitive team with an offensive-minded young head coach. These two teams could not be more polar opposites, and in my opinion, heading in two completely different directions. I am already on record as saying Mike McDaniel is the next Sean McVay. Tua Tagovailoa finally has a system to complement his skill set and a squad of seriously speedy weapons. Tyreek Hill and Jaylen Waddle are both electrifying wide receivers who can single-handedly bring a well-coached defense to its knees.

On the other side of the ball, the Patriots’ offense is going to be horrendous. Mac Jones is a solid player and is protected by a good offensive line and a couple of good running backs. The problem? The Patriots receiving corps is well below average and the unit is coached by a duo of failed NFL head coaches, neither of whom has any business running an offense. The Dolphins’ defense is set to be stronger this season, especially if McDaniel can get the running game going with the Shanahan-style system. This result would certainly surprise many, but refer to this blurb when I don’t even look up from my Monday newspaper.

D’Andre Swift is the Top Scorer in Fantasy as Lions Upset Eagles

Ooooo, muy picante! Everyone in the world is expecting the Eagles to parlay their great offseason into a division title and Super Bowl run…right?! Pepperidge Farm remembers when the Eagles went all in to push for the title in 2011, pushing the chips in on Michael Vick and bookend cornerbacks Asante Samuel and Nnamdi Asomugha. They finished 8-8 that season and missed the playoffs. On paper, the Eagles should easily beat the Lions. On the football field, I expect Detroit to hold their own. Swift is a magnificent RB with a huge role in the receiving game. The Eagles added Haason Reddick to bolster their pass rush and James Bradberry to shore up a weak corner spot opposite Darius Slay. This only serves to funnel more volume to the middle of the field, where the Eagles were absolutely atrocious in 2021. Even Kyzir White added to this linebacking corps doesn’t give me confidence they can slow down Detroit’s best weapons in Swift, TJ Hockenson and Amon-Ra St. Brown.

The Lions are built to punch the Eagles in their soft spots and the Eagles are built to fold like a lawn chair in response. Detroit is similarly built through the trenches, but coaching matters. Dan Campbell makes me want to smash my head into a brick wall, while Nick Sirianni elicits me to sip a cappuccino and read the latest Reader’s Digest. Week 1 will set into motion a surprising winning season for the Lions and a huge letdown for the “loaded” Eagles. Swift is going for 30-plus PPR points to kick it off.

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If you want to dive deeper into fantasy football, be sure to check out our award-winning slate of Fantasy Football Tools as you navigate your season. From our Start/Sit Assistant – which provides your optimal lineup, based on accurate consensus projections – to our Waiver Wire Assistant – that allows you to quickly see which available players will improve your team and by how much – we’ve got you covered this fantasy football season.

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