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Fantasy Football Hot Takes: DeVonta Smith, Alvin Kamara, Tyreek Hill, Jake Browning (Week 13)

Fantasy Football Hot Takes: DeVonta Smith, Alvin Kamara, Tyreek Hill, Jake Browning (Week 13)

Buying something for myself has never been a problem. I am pretty impulsive when I come across things that suit me. This trait of mine naturally means I’m often labeled as “difficult to buy for.” I also put up an awkward shell when someone asks me what I would like as a gift. “Oh, that’s not necessary” is the go-to response. Gone are the days when I had to pray to every imaginable higher power for my mom to get me a Sega Genesis.

That was the Christmas I actually burst into joyous tears when I opened the very last gift under the silver-tip pine skirted with red and forest green plaid. It changed me. No gift would ever be more thoughtful, more appreciated than that one. I played that Genesis until blowing on the cartridges no longer got them working again and I used my lawn mowing earnings on a Nintendo 64. From then on, I didn’t wait for someone else to get something for me that I could get myself.

When we drafted our fantasy teams before the season, we had quite the wishlist. Every manager out there dreamt of hitting the nuts on the perfect roster. Every late-round pick is a breakout; every stud stays healthy. By the time Santa Claus shimmies through the soot and takes a nip of that “milk” I set out for him, we’re happy if we held it together through the bye weeks. Just give me Madden ’94 and Sonic the Hedgehog and I’m all set.

A crackling fireplace fills the neighborhood air with the intoxicating scent of oak smoke. The lights and decorations went up before Thanksgiving this year, partly because it wasn’t our year to host dinner. It was also in spite of my pleas against Thanksgiving erasure. Then everyone at the table had the audacity to ask me what I wanted for Christmas. They mean well in their sacrilege, but I hadn’t yet digested my meal or all three football games that day. Since everyone was in attendance, I said I wanted a new $3,500 barbecue and that they could either pool together and get it for me or think of something different on their own.

It was a pretty bold move from a guy whose mother made most of my gifts by hand growing up (except for that one year). The sticker shock ploy worked because they all laughed in unison at how preposterous it sounded. By now you understand that it is in my nature to be preposterous. I’ve been correctly predicting otherwise unforeseen game scripts all season. There have also been calls I’ve made with my chest puffed out that ended up comically bad. I’ll keep going for it on fourth and long. We’re keeping it spicy around here, always and forever.

Fantasy Football Hot Takes: Week 13

DeVonta Smith Marks the 49ers Defense for Death With 150 Yards and Two Touchdowns; Eagles Outlast 49ers by At Least Seven Points

It seems strange that the 49ers are road favorites in Philadelphia against the 10-1 Eagles. These teams are both incredibly well-built, but I’m in the minority opinion that the Eagles are the better team. Jalen Hurts has been unbelievable this season, especially considering his limited mobility with a sore knee.

Hurts still rips Cover-3 to shreds, with his weapon of choice being Smith – the Slim Reaper. If San Francisco mans up on Philly to slow down the running game and keep Smith from getting loose, it only means that AJ Brown will belly up to the table to put on a show. This will be a well-fought contest, with more scoring than expected. If Philly can slow down Brock Purdy by getting after him with pressure, they might blow out the Bay Boys.

Alvin Kamara Sets a Season-High in Receptions and Receiving Yards; Saints Light Up the Scoreboard and Beat Lions in a Game that Totals 70 Points

Don’t feel bad that so many good players on your fantasy rosters are on bye. Rejoice that there will be so many breakout performances on this slate. Detroit can score with any team in the NFL, but their defense has not done them favors. Jared Goff has suddenly become turnover-prone the last two weeks and now faces a tough Saints defense.

Derek Carr has been his usual flimsy self in the red zone this season. It seems only Taysom Hill can score touchdowns for this team, unless Kamara is sprung on one of the many check-down opportunities that have him leading all RBs in targets and receptions. Injuries in the New Orleans receiving corps have caused an even more acute bias toward Kamara, but look for Juwan Johnson to continue to be a viable player for fantasy. Detroit needs this game to fire one over the bow and put the league on notice, but New Orleans is the type of team that can give them fits.

Tyreek Hill Accounts for 200 of Tua Tagovailoa‘s 400 Yards; Commanders Cover the Spread in a Game With 1,000 Combined Offensive Yards

The Commanders have a really bad pass defense. It’s already the murmur diffusing through the industry ad nauseam. The Dolphins have an awesome passing game. Tua Tagovailoa is having a really strong campaign and the Cheetah – Hill – is still on pace for more than 2,000 receiving yards. The matchup advantage for Hill and Jaylen Waddle in this game is staggering. This is the game where records could truly fall.

Sam Howell leads the NFL in passing yards, while Miami just lost one of their best pass rushers (Jaelan Phillips) to a torn Achilles. The Commanders might not be up to keeping pace with the Phins on the scoreboard, but they should encounter very little resistance in moving the ball down the field. Look for a few Washington receivers to exceed projections, especially Jahan Dotson and Curtis Samuel.

Jake Browning is a Top-10 Fantasy QB on the Week; Bengals Stun Jaguars By Scoring 35 in Road Win

It’s strange how little has been said about Jake Browning being the best QB in the history of high school football. He was a four-year starter who led the Washington Huskies to the College Football Playoff. He should get Tee Higgins back for Monday night’s game in Duval County.

Browning being a NorCal native isn’t the only reason I have him rostered on more of my dynasty teams than I do with Joe Burrow. I know how good he is. I also value Higgins’ return as one that can restore this offense to a caliber worthy of a playoff team without Burrow. The Jaguars have been a really solid team, but have occasionally struggled to find the end zone. Their defense has also been a liability when unable to force turnovers. I love a nice, spicy prediction revolving around a local favorite. It might be time to dust of the old #InsufferaBo if this one hits.

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